Sleepless......

The past week or so has brought changes in the behavior of our sweet Nugget and this afternoon Thom drove her to the vet to determine the cause. For quite some time she has had a large mass on her shoulder and we assumed this was the cause of her issues. Not so. The doctor ran some blood tests and did a minimal ultrasound but was able to ascertain her lack of energy and appetite is a result of bleeding in her spleen most likely cause by cancer.
Tomorrow she returns for xrays and a more complete ultrasound which will let us know if and how far the cancer may have spread. The prognosis is dismal. Best case would be no evidence of invasion of other organs which would leave the choice to have her spleen removed and analyzed.....if cancer she would have only a few weeks, if not she may have a few months. If the disease has reached her lungs (as the vet expects) nothing can be done and she will likely have only a short time left.
We will be faced with some hard choices in the next few days. I can't bear the thought of losing her and have found myself melting to tears repeatedly. Sleeping is impossible.
She and Divot have been our "children" for nearly 10 years ......praying for wise and compassionate decisions and strength as we handle this loss. I love her so much......